In Search Of a Better Caffeine Delivery System

I am not a coffee drinker, mainly because of a sweet tooth that demands 17 teaspoons of sugar to make any brew palatable. I do like the Starbucks Frappacino, which is about as close as I get to coffee, but who can afford those every day?

This morning I tried to make my own with some day-old coffee, chocolate syrup from a forgotten birthday party and that powdered non-dairy creamer. The freezer in the break room was overdue for a defrosting, but I managed to shove my experiment in next to a stack of Lean Cuisine.

An hour later the result was clearly not in the same ballpark as the Starbuck's recipe. My concoction was so toxic, in fact, that I decided against pouring it down the drain. In the end I had to call in a HazMat team to take it away. I'm almost proud to say that my homemade Frappacino will soon reside in the same storage facility as Level 4 nuclear waste.